I walk next to her and wrap her up in my arms, she buries her face in my stomach and holds me tight around the waist. She’s not crying though. I’m not sure if that’s because she is focusing on staying calm for him, since they can feel each other through the bond, or if she’s coming to terms with the worst possible outcome. I don’t say anything, if she needs to talk to me she will.
This time it was hours before a healer came back into the room. Someone brought in a small cot for the Luna to lay on and rest, and she insisted that I sit with her. She has kept contact with me since I hugged her, she seems to be as reluctant to let me go as the Alpha was. When the healer enters we both sit up straight, listening intently.
“The Alpha is out of surgery now. When they are done dressing his wounds they will bring him back in here for you to sit with him. It would be best if you stayed while he heals. It will make it progress more quickly. The young Alphas and a few others have been asking to see you for an update. What would you like me to tell them?”
“Cameron and Dakota can come back, they need to see their dad. You can tell the rest he’s out of surgery and I will update them all soon.”
“I can go talk to them Luna, I need to update my team and make sure we have security set…”
“No, you need to be here when he comes back, you promised you would be here. He needs to see you as much, maybe more, than the boys.”
I just nod. I don’t agree with her, but I don’t want to argue with her either when she’s like this. The last time I was in a room with the four of them, I was called a traitor and accused of all kinds of things. I really don’t want a repeat.
I stay by the Luna as they wheel in the Alpha, fast asleep on his bed. At least he has color to him now and with the drape of the blankets, you would never know what he just went through looking at him. He jus looks peacefully asleep. Luna Ava doesn’t move from her chair right away, she just sits and stares. I really wish I knew what was going on in her mind.
The twins walk in soon after and I can hear Kaley’s high pitched squeals from the hallway.
“A Luna needs to be with her Alphas at a time like this… get your hands off me and let me through…I will have you know…”
Dakota slams the door shut and takes a deep breath. When he turns around he avoids eye contact with me and stands next to Cam on the other side of the bed. They both look sad and lost, like the little boys used to know.
“What did they say mom?” Cam finally asks after a long silence.
“Nothing yet, we were waiting on you. He’s here and alive and that’s the most I know.” She finally stands and walks to them wrapping them each in an arm. They both tuck their heads into a side of her neck and I wish I could take a picture of the moment, even though it is not an ideal situation, this moment is special and precious. These massive guys lean into their mother, who’s at least a foot shorter than them, for comfort.
The lead healer walks in and looks around the room at all of us. I lower my head and make myself as small as possible back by the cot Luna and I were just sitting in.
“You can speak, everyone here is family.” My head shoots up at the Luna’s words. But I don’t get to question them when the healer starts to speak.
“There was a significant amount of damage from the wood. The Alpha’s entire oblique muscle on his left side will more than likely have permanent damage. Splinters also pierced his kidney, part of his liver, the lower lobe of his lung and his intestines. He has a lot of healing to do and after, I don’t recommend he remains in the Alpha position, you boys should prepare yourselves.” She gives the twins a serious look. This is not a suggestion. “For now he is stable and we are monitoring him hourly. He has not opened his eyes yet, but I believe he will when he’s ready. Let us know if anything happens or changes.” She looks each of us in the eyes, then turns and leaves, taking the buffer of her neutral presence with her.
I stayed against the wall next to the cot, wishing it was on the wall closest to the door, not the furthest. I just want to leave. My chest still hurts and I know it’s not from the fight with the Alpha or being thrown by him, it’s from seeing them.
I don’t know why the Luna wants me here. This just isn’t my place. I take a deep slow breath and steel myself to just move towards the door, it won’t go unnoticed and it will be super awkward. I turn and start walking.
“Skylar Makain, stop right there. You will stay in this room until the Alpha wakes up. He needs you.”
“Why?” I ask, still facing the door. My voice is more confident than I expected. “I have a team to organize and patrols to work out. I need to coordinate with Delta Kyle and I am going to be bombarded with questions from people in the waiting room. Please let me do my job.”
“Your job is here right now, and you can organize everything from this room, don’t run away from us.” She doesn’t sound angry or sad, she sounds hollow, all business.
Now I am angry. It licks up my insides like a flame and I see red. My wolf is letting her anger seep into mine as well. She has felt just as betrayed as I have. Wolves are pack animals, they need their pack and she was just as betrayed by them as I was. This woman has been like my mother for a very long time, but when push came to shove, it was not me she chose to protect.
“You have made it very clear where I fall in your list of priorities, Luna. I have not run yet and I don’t intend to, this is my pack just as much as it is yours. Why would I want to stay in the company of people who openly despise me, think that I’m a traitor and would sacrifice my pack? I did my duty, My Alpha is safe and protected, I am not needed here. I will send Gamma Brett to stay with you. I think you need to be with someone at all times until the Alpha wakes up. And as we are all aware, no one from the pack is allowed to mindlink with me. So I cannot coordinate with anyone while I am here.”
I turn to leave again, feeling very much like the teenager I never really got to be. But, proud for sticking up for myself for once. I love them all, but it’s not enough right now, they need to love me the same amount in return.
