Chapter 107 Fighting Your Own Demons
Yasmin’s mansion had a balcony which also served as an observation deck. It offered a panoramic view from the balcony. On top of that, she had specially built a swimming pool there.
At that moment, the bright morning sunlight shone into the swimming pool. The pool glittered with the sun rays shining in.
Jonathan and Yasmin were seated on the lounge chairs under a parasol.
With a tormented expression, Yasmin asked, “Is Connor really gone?”
Jonathan nodded grimly and replied, “Yes, he’s gone.”
Instantly, tears welled up in Yasmin’s eyes. She asked again, “When did it happen?”
Jonathan answered, “About half a year ago.”
Yasmin tried hard to stop her tears from falling. After a while of silence, she uttered, “What has Connor been doing out there for so many years? Why did he perish? How did you guys know each other?”
After taking a deep breath, Jonathan replied, “Back then, Connor was on the run after taking the life of someone for his uncle. With the help of his uncle, Connor escaped to a small country in Smealand called Quesdia. Initially, Connor worked for a general in Quesdia. Unfortunately, that general was defeated by rebel enemies in the end. After the attack, that general died. With no other choice, Connor joined other mercenaries. At that time, I joined the same mercenary team and met him. At first, Connor was the weakest mercenary soldier on the team. As a result, the other teammates often bullied him. I took pity on him and helped him whenever I could. Eventually, I also taught him skills and marksmanship. From there, we became as close as brothers.”
After a pause, Jonathan continued, “After some time, that mercenary team was wary of me for my outstanding performance. The leader of the mercenary team even planned on assassinating me as he wanted me out of his way. After Connor got to know his plan, he warned me about it. That night, Connor and I fled from that mercenary team. After our escape, we bit the bullet and set up our own mercenary team instead. We called our team Red Wolves. I was Alpha Wolf, the leader of the Red Wolves. Connor was my second-in-command, Beta Wolf. After three years, we became the top mercenary team in Smealand.”
Jonathan added, “Unfortunately, Connor perished in a mission half a year ago. I knew he was most worried about you when he was alive. Hence, I disbanded Red Wolves and returned to Horington to take care of you.”
After Yasmin heard Jonathan’s words, her eyes were filled with tears. Next, she asked, “Where is Connor buried now?”
In a low voice, Jonathan replied, “I buried him in the woods, back in Smealand.”
With a sorrowful tone, Yasmin probed, “Can you bring me there? I wish to pay my respects to Connor.”
Jonathan nodded and replied, “Of course. We can set off anytime. Just let me know when you are ready.”
Yasmin answered, “I’ve been tied up at work lately, so I can’t leave yet. I will have some time about one month later.”
“All right. I will wait for you.”
Yasmin gazed deeply at Jonathan and said, “No matter what, I have to thank you.”
Jonathan looked guilty and replied, “Please don’t say that. I failed to take care of Connor. It’s my fault.”
Yasmin responded, “I’m sure Connor never regretted following a brotherly friend like you.”
After Jonathan heard that, he fell silent for some time. He reminisced the good old days with Connor. The latter was like a brother to him. Together, they drank and flirted with the ladies at bars. On their missions, they braved countless crossfires together. At nightfall, the duo slept on mud swamps and chatted about anything in life. Hence, their friendship was ride-or-die.
However, Connor was now deceased, leaving Jonathan behind.
When Jonathan thought about it, he was guilt-ridden and sorrowful. Suddenly, Jonathan uttered, “Yasmin, I am sorry. Actually, I lied to you. Connor did not perish in a mission.”
At that moment, Yasmin was stunned.
Jonathan was a thoughtful person who had intricate emotions. On the one hand, he did not wish to let Yasmin know about Connor’s blemished past. On the other hand, he did not want to lie to Yasmin. Even more so, he did not wish to evade the truth. The truth was—Jonathan was indirectly related to Connor’s death.
“What actually happened?” asked Yasmin anxiously, with a changed expression.
With a painful look in his eyes, Jonathan explained, “About half a year ago, we received a mission. We were supposed to bomb a bridge for the Corleon rebels. However, the enemy organization got to know about it beforehand. In turn, they sent a female spy over who seduced Connor. Unfortunately, Connor exposed our location out of carelessness. As a result, eight of our men died during the mission. Finally, Connor and I escaped after a fierce fight. At that time, we were infuriated after deducing there must be a spy among us. In the end, Connor stepped up and apologized. He admitted his grave mistake to me and accounted for the truth.”
When Yasmin heard that, her body shook violently. She asked, “Did Connor die in your hands in the end?”
In response, Jonathan shook his head. He explained, “I did not take his life. However, I was disheartened at that time. After that, I decided to disband Red Wolves. Even so, I did not tell Connor about it. Instead, I told him to leave Red Wolves on his own accord. In the future, we will have nothing to do with each other anymore. However, I did not expect him to have such strong pride. When I looked away, his gun misfired. He was shot in the head with a bullet. Before he succumbed to his injury, he told me he would always be a part of Red Wolves. Even in the afterworld…”
At that point, Jonathan was tormented by self-reproach. He said, “Yasmin, I am sorry. Connor and I set up Red Wolves together. I should have considered his feelings when I wanted to disband the team. If I spared more thought for his feelings, he would have been able to rest in peace.”
After Yasmin heard that, she heaved a long sigh of relief. She was deeply scared that Jonathan was the one who ended Connor’s life. If that had happened, she could never forgive Jonathan. Hence, she was thankful that was not the case.
Yasmin did not blame Jonathan for Connor’s death. Instead, she said, “Please don’t blame yourself. You wanted to disband the team out of frustration at that time. Hence, you were not in the right frame of mind. As for Connor’s death, it was simply unfortunate. I hope he is at peace in heaven. I’m sure he will not regret having you as a buddy.”
After hearing Yasmin’s words, Jonathan felt slightly better.
The duo kept quiet for a while. Together, they observed a moment of silence for Connor.
Shortly after, Yasmin seemed to recall something. She asked Jonathan, “Do the people from Strikezone Martial Arts still bother you?”
Jonathan shook his head and replied, “No. This time, Amber’s Grandpa has warned them. No matter what, those guys have to respect him.”
Yasmin knew Amber had a powerful background. Hence, she was relieved to hear that from Jonathan.
On that day, Yasmin insisted on going back to work. Although Jonathan was worried about her, he noticed she looked normal. Thus, he did not comment any further. Out of no choice, Jonathan asked Jessica for a favor. He told her to take good care of Yasmin.
Although Jessica did not fully understand what went on, she could tell that Yasmin was feeling a bit off. Jessica responded, “Don’t worry, Yasmin and I are best friends. I will look after her.”
After that, Jonathan nodded in acknowledgement.
That night, Jonathan and Jessica became much somber instantly. The duo was no longer at loggerheads like before.
As a matter of fact, Jessica’s heart was in turmoil that night. She had heard about Jonathan’s crisis from Yasmin. Next, Yasmin looked lost and confused when she said Jonathan was dead. At that time, Jessica’s heart was overwhelmed with suffocating pain. There was a sense of unspeakable sorrow looming in her heart.
In the end, Jonathan turned out to be alive. It was as if she had been through a rollercoaster ride of emotions.
Together with Yasmin, Jessica felt like they had put Jonathan in danger. After all, Jonathan incurred the wrath of Strikezone Martial Arts for them. As Jessica thought about that, she felt even more troubled.
Without a doubt, Jessica’s feelings for Jonathan were unique.
At midday, Jonathan went to the coffee house.
Polly was at the coffee house break room with him. Together, they sat on the floor across from each other, with their legs folded.
“After going through a near-death experience, do you have any words to say?” asked Polly with a slight smile.
With a bitter smile, Jonathan replied, “I was on the verge of death twice yesterday. First, we were helpless in front of that person. That was because we lack the experience, too. Next, I exchanged a few blows with him. Even though I lost in the end, I discovered a crucial point.”
Polly answered, “Oh, what is that?”
Jonathan replied, “With my fighting experience, I am fearless even in the face of weapons. However, I was intimidated by that person’s aura when I dueled with him yesterday. I found myself giving way to his punches when I was fighting him. The more I evaded his moves, the quicker I was losing.”
Polly replied, “That’s right. I noticed that too.”
Jonathan added, “In the end, I overcame my fear. I’ve realized that even though the person was powerful, he was still a human being after all. Hence, I was able to fight with him for a while.”
Polly remarked, “We have to fight our own demons. Humans are controlled by their desires and emotions. That is how faith can succumb to attacks by evil forces. The most powerful thing that person can do is to lure your inner demon out. When you say you’ve overcome your fear, I’d say it’s because you overcame your own demons instead.” After a pause, Polly continued, “I learned something last night as well. After you left, I suddenly realized something.”
Looking slightly surprised, Jonathan asked, “ Oh, what did you realize?”
Polly said, “People may come and go in life. Nothing remains the same forever. The surrounding people, like my friends, will all come to a demise one day from the tribulations of life. That includes you; you will be gone too. This is the natural cycle of life. I play the role of a neutral observer. As I observe the people around me, I am also rediscovering myself. When I feel Amber’s sadness and experience the rest of the emotions, I feel I am nothing but a passerby in their lives.”
Jonathan was astonished for a moment when he heard Polly’s words. He replied, “I’m not sure if that is a good sign, Polly. Are you thinking about spending your life religiously as a nun from now?”
Polly replied, “I will go with the flow of life. To live my life infinitely, I must detach myself from the burden of human emotions. That is the way of enlightenment I seek.”
Jonathan did not utter a word any further as he resonated with Polly’s words. Both of them had to figure out the road ahead. Thus, Jonathan could not say that Polly was wrong. Likewise, it was the same for her.
As Jonathan and Polly continued chatting, Donovan came in from outside.
“Jonathan, Ms. Sheene is here. She is looking for you,” informed Donovan.
Jonathan was slightly taken aback when he heard that. He stood up and replied, “All right, I will meet her now.”
As Jonathan was about to step out, Polly suddenly called out to him. She said, “Jonathan, wait a minute.”
The latter was caught in a daze. He turned around and looked at the woman. “What is it, Polly?”
“If you really like Jennifer, then don’t suppress the emotions in your heart. If you don’t want to get married, then don’t do it. However, if you truly like Jennifer, then marry her. I’d advise you to go with your heart. Let your heart lead the way. When that happens, you may embark on a path that is truly meant for you.”
Jonathan broke into a bittersweet smile. He said, “If I wish to be with Jennifer but not marry her, she will be unhappy. When she is sad, I will be miserable too. However, if I marry her, I will be the one who is unhappy in the end.”
Polly reminded Jonathan, “As long as you leave this mess unsorted, you will never be able to ascend into the Nascent Soul stage.”
